Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Mini Fridge for Lipstick!

So if you're rich enough to buy cosmetics that are expensive enough to want to keep from spoiling (!?), wouldn't your HOUSE be climate controlled? I guess if you wanted to take your powder to the pool cabana, this could be useful.

Climate-controlled Cosmetics Case

"Our Climate-controlled Cosmetics Case is the ultimate home for your premium skin care products. Store your precious creams, moisturizers, and more in this whisper-quiet, climate-controlled case that prolongs effectiveness, prevents deterioration, and ensures ease and comfort of application."

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Monday, September 29, 2008

Anti-Green Appliance

OK, so I don't live in Minnesota or Upstate New York, so maybe there's something to this product, but honestly, I've always tossed my wet shoes in front of the fridge where the warm exhaust comes out under the door. Sure, you can't fit but two pairs, but neither can this $95 Boot and Clothes Dryer. But the fridge is already running and using the exhaust is enviro-friendly!

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Saturday, September 27, 2008

What's Wrong with Using Your Finger?!

OK, so you should use your knife or another utensil, but seriously you should not buy a $16 fork.

"Stainless Steel Serving Fork - Just squeeze this fork, and food is released.

No more awkward fumbling at the buffet table! Guests will have an easier time helping themselves to platters of food—a simple squeeze of the handle instantly releases food to their plates. "

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The $200 Zip-Loc Bag

Why just throw meat and marinade in a ziploc into the fridge, when you can fire up this baby! Apparently it tumbles the food......what, you can't shakeshakeshake that bag?! I guess there's some suction vacuum thing that makes it work faster. To save $200 I'll work on just remembering to do the marinade in the morning.

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Monday, September 15, 2008

Update: Now You Can Spend $600 on Margaritas

And I thought it wasn't possible to top this.....

But the good folks at Frontgate will save you from having any unused storage space and having extra cash in the bank.

Just buy this updated frozen margarita machine.

The copy is priceless...

Tahiti Margaritaville Frozen Drink Machine

Our Tahiti Margaritaville Frozen Drink Machine is the ultimate bartender. It features three 24-ounce blending jars to create multiple frozen drinks at the same time.

  • Rotating ice hopper sends shaved ice to all 3 blending jars
  • 6 fully automatic, preprogrammed drink settings take the guesswork out of making delectable frozen drinks
  • Also great for healthy drinks like smoothies
  • Tropical bamboo accents for that island feeling in your home

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Sunday, September 14, 2008

Useless Kids Can't Even Build Own Forts?!

I'm trying to figure out what house doesn't have chairs and sheets and brooms and other implements needed to build forts or teepees.....oh....one's without IMAGINATION but with OVERLY ORDERLY psycho-moms. Good thing they can buy one and further stunt their child's development. Hopefully every persnickety mom can find something to match the decor.

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Friday, September 12, 2008

Because They Stopped Giving Out Bags at the Stores?

Reduce, reuse, recycle.....buy something that looks like you reused? Not sure this last step helps. These are cute bags, but really, that's what the shopping bag is FOR! Why buy a paper bag?

Take the $32 and spend on "crap from the gap" and you will ALSO get a handy dandy bag!

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Saturday, September 6, 2008

Hard Hat for Hair Dryer

I'm running out of witticism for this blog....who needs it when the products are so hilarious?! Like this protector for your hair dryer

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Friday, September 5, 2008

How Many Rolls of Masking Tape and Sharpies Would $19.95 Buy?

So for that price, I get ONE of these digital "days ago" timers to tell me when to throw stuff out of the fridge? Seriously? Throw it out when it's hairy or you want to puke when you open it. If it has vinegar in it....eh!

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Thursday, September 4, 2008

Gee, I wish I felt like I were on a rubber raft....

So, an inflatable mattress is a good idea - deflates for storage, cheap, cover with sleeping bag or sheets and children can have a sleep over. If you don't have extra bedroom and want comfortable guestbed, a really nice one can be had. But I don't think any grownup should ever have to sit on inflatable furniture. And socialize.

"Why settle for just an inflatable queen size bed when you can have the 5 in 1 Sofa Bed! It is more than just an inflatable bed, it is also a greater value for your money! The 5 in 1 Sofa Bed is the ultimate sleeping and seating solution. It will provide you with more space in small living quarters and also give you a great place to sleep. The 5 in 1 Sofa Bed will make a great addition to any living room, bedroom, guest room, recreation room or any studio apartment."

Every time you spend money at this level $99.95 for something that is temporary, tasteless, and ridiculous, you are $99 away from buying something reasonable! Here's a tip: buy what you really want and if you can't afford that, save money buy making do without, buying the absolute cheapest thing you can, or buying something you can later re-purpose downward (eg lawn furniture used inside until you can afford the dining room set).

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Wednesday, September 3, 2008

Better Stay Out of the Kitchen

More from the Land of Incompetents! If making big hamburgers is hard, the how about little ones? HARDER!

The video on website is priceless - that person should stay away from heat and sharp objects!
The best part is that the only thing "hard" about making mini hamburgers (aka "sliders") is that you can't buy buns for them. But there's NO MENTION of how to get the mini buns on the website!!!

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Tuesday, September 2, 2008

Overstimulated Kids Edition

But how do you shake the television?!

Now I've seen everything. An Etch-a-Sketch for your TV.....

Words fail....

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Monday, September 1, 2008

When Any Old Hand-Me-Down Box Won't Do

Ok, I admit the copy on this site is clever and it is ecologically sound (except for the shipping of course!) but this is pretty silly. BUYING a cardboard box for your kid to play in. Way to teach imagination, creativity, and self-sufficiency.

There's a reason kids love boxes - they can be anything! It's a running gag in the comic Red and Rover with the kid making up new ways to use the box.

But that's what you got at FridgeBox! Even comes in the right shapes. Jeez.... I know I rail against stuff you don't need but at least get it free and local if you have to have it. Try www.freecycle.com or www.craigslist.com to find community near you - someone is always getting rid of boxes!

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